Motorway Magic
Albany Centre, Bristol
17th - 19th December 1982
Arts Centre Theatre presents
MOTORWAY MAGIC
by Mike Thorne
CAST
Connie - Mike Thorne
Chip - Yvonne Hellin
Catastrophe - Yvonne Ellis
Juggernaut - Robin Seavill
Big Business - Julian Simmonds
Flora - Lizzie May
Little Wildlife - Phyl Chandler
Stepmother Wildlife - Richard Henderson
Daddy Wildlife - Tony Esden
Rank Weed 1 - Linda Simmonds
Rank Weed 2 - Vicki Hooper
French Vivisectionist 1 - Liz Vickery
Frenc Vivisectionist 2 - Angela Wakehurst
Relay 1 - Linda Simmonds
Relay 2 - Vicki Hooper
Sign - Tony Smith
MUSIC BY
Mike Wakelin
DIRECTED BY
Tony Smith
PS
Now this is something you don’t see every year: an ecological pantomime, though as time goes on, they may become a lot more common. As the programme note helpfully informs us, “In Motorway Magic Mike Thorne imaginatively combines the traditional and much-loved elements of Pantomime with the topical, thought-provoking theme of Conservation through a series of crazy events in the life of a small creature living on the verge of the M4 and we witness the continual struggle of all forms of wildlife to survive. As in any good Panto – evil is vanquished, and here, Wildlife triumphs over Pollution and Vivisection.” So, timely and well-meaning then, if not necessarily seasonal in nature.
I see the cast list includes a couple of French Vivisectionists. I’m not sure quite how French vivisectionists would be different from vivisectionists of any other nationality, but it’s good to know they managed to sneak in under the wire just before the Iron Curtain of Brexit came crashing down, cutting us off from international trade, freedom of movement, workers’ rights, and any hope of prosperity for the next several generations.
I also remember the music was exceptionally good, though since no tape of the show survives, I can only remember the melodies in snatches. The composer was very serious about making a go of his song writing – I seem to recall he had ambitions to write a West End show based on the life of Marilyn Monroe – but alas we never stayed in touch so nothing ever came of it from my point of view. I hope he achieved some of his dreams, even though I suspect the Marilyn Monroe route would be a thorny one to negotiate, as I suspect he wouldn’t have been the first person to have had the notion.
And apparently I played a Juggernaut, dressed to resemble a big lorry or a downmarket haulier. I know I looked more like a train driver than anything else, though maybe that was down to a failure in my method acting – didn’t have the right thought in the costume – though it was my first experience with what someone called a Falstaff sack or Falstaff bag, that is, a kind of overstuffed waistcoat you put on under everything else to give a slender frame heft and bulk. A slender frame is certainly what I had at the time, though under all that lot I must have looked like a lot of kids’ uncles, because on the Saturday matinee I made the mistake of getting too close to them and the entire front row took it into their nit-ridden little nappers to kidnap me en masse, jumping all over me as if I were a soft-play area and nearly making me miss my cue. Bloody ruffians. Shows like this were wasted on hooligans like them.